How to Turn a Girl on to Spanking

Spanking feels good, and it can also turn a girl on. It stimulates the nerves that run from the derriere to the vulva, which are sensitive and trigger sexual stimulation.

Spanking is not an aggressive act, and it can help a man get his inner dom on (if he’s already established that his lady friend is cool with it). It’s just a fun way to test out boundaries.

How to Spank A Girl

Spanking is a type of corporal punishment consisting of hand-slapping, or other actions such as pinching, rubbing, and stroking. This is done on a person in order to discipline them or instill fear in them to stop misbehaving.

The typical way to warm up a girl’s fetus is with gentle strokes, which can then be escalated into more intense swats. It’s important to vary the intensity and alternate the hits with other kinky actions that will increase her excitement. This could include squeezing or slapping her thigh, rubbing her inner thighs or spanking her booty. This will make her both feel sexy, and powerful. Most people will be hooked on this combination.

The most important thing to remember about spanking is that it must be done responsibly, and with consent. It’s important that you and your partner discuss how you intend to use sex-spanking. You should also decide on a word of safety that you both feel comfortable using. This will ensure that if at any point you both decide to end the spanking session, then you will be able to do so by saying your agreed upon word. This will prevent the experience from becoming uncomfortable.

Spanking Techniques

For many BDSM people, spanking is not only a sexual turn-on, but also an integral part of their play. It can add a whole new layer of depth to sex, and is a fun way to spice up an ordinary relationship.

If you’re going to be the Top in a spanking scene, it’s important to know your partner’s body language and other sensitivities. It is normal for the Bottom during spanking to wince, squeal or flinch. But if they become visibly panicked or cry, it’s time to call it quits.

Some spanking methods involve the use of an implement, such as a brush, hairbrush or hand-held paddle. Hairbrushes that have a flat back are a good alternative to plastic. Also, rulers, wooden spatulas or spoons, paint stirrers, and belts can be used. Some people like to cup their hand before striking, which reduces the amount of pain they feel but elicits a more pronounced sound. This can be particularly effective with a sub that doesn’t tolerate pain well, or if you want to create a more dramatic effect.

It’s better to introduce the idea of spanking to your partner in a nonsexual context. Start with a light tap or slap before moving on to a full-on spanking. Wilde suggests alternating spanking and ‘vanilla sex acts’ to “keep things interesting and give both partners the needs they need.” She recommends couples start with the underwear layer, and then progress to the bare skin as they ramp up.

Spanking Tips

A key to effective spanking is that each swat has its own unique sensation. To achieve this, you can vary the time between each swat as well as the location and pressure of the hand. For instance, using your forearm instead of your wrist can create a different timbre that feels more penetrating and erotic. The hand’s movement (which is created by the looseness of your grip, the slight swinging of the arm and the angle at which the hand touches the skin) can be used to increase the intensity and depth.

You should also know the frame and limits of your sub. If she gets too hot or tired, you should either slow down or switch positions. If you plan to increase the intensity, let her know beforehand.

In addition, it’s generally a good idea to start with light smacks and slowly build up intensity. Remember that the inner lower quadrant of your buttocks shares a nerve with the genitals.

Lastly, as with bondage and any other new sex act, it’s always a good idea to talk about it before you try it. Some folks will want aftercare afterwards, like cuddling, while others may prefer to just be left alone for a while so they can come down from the hormonal rush that spanking can create.

Spanking Aftercare

Aftercare is checking in with your boo, and sitting in a mutual space while you both come down from a hormonal rush that can happen during a spanking. Pleasure-based queer-inclusive kink educator Lateef Taylor says that “just like all therapy, for spanking to count as spanking therapy, you need to go into it with intention.”

Some aftercare activities include cuddling or food (cuddles and carbs, also known as BDSM aftercare) to replenish your body. Other activities include oral sex or a massage.

Another aspect of aftercare is caring for any bruises or abrasions from the spanking session. Some people use ointment as a soothing agent. Others find that a glass of water or Gatorade helps hydrate them and introduces needed electrolytes.

Many people who were spanked by their parents as children still use corporal punishment to discipline their own children. Many parents who spank themselves or their children feel guilty about it, despite the fact that research has shown that this type of discipline can stunt some brain development and lead to a decrease in empathy (source). If you are still a spanker, I encourage you write your own story about the harm that corporal punishment causes and how Christ’s love and forgiveness is the better model to follow.