Getting Your Asses Spanked
Spanking is a great way to grab a woman’s focus during sex. It’s a great way to test her interest before moving on to more serious implements.
Why do men spank so much? And why is it so hot for women, too?
1. It’s a form of punishment
One of the first things people think of when they want to spice up their sex life is spanking. It’s not for everyone but those who like it will find it a great way to grab their partner’s attention and signal that something is going on.
Plante believes that a person’s interest in spanking may be tied to their sexual script, which is a set of sociological blueprints that answers the who, what, where, when, and why of our sexual interests. Depending on their sexual script, a person may prefer to strike or be struck, and whether they prefer to be the dominant or submissive.
Spankings can range from hand to ass spankings to more intense ass whacks with a cane or paddle. Ask your partner what they like before you try erotic spanking. If they give you the WTF look, then it’s unlikely to work. If they smile and nod you have their permission. You might be surprised that they also like it!
2. It’s a form of affection
Spanking can be a form affection and is especially sweet when it’s done during sex. Many people find that spanking their partner feels like a jolt of pleasure, and it’s often more satisfying than sexual intercourse.
It’s also a way to express love and trust, and it can be used as a reward. However, it’s important to remember that spanking is not always pleasant. It can cause pain, or even injuries depending on the person. It’s important that you always check with your partner prior to beginning a spanking.
Plante suggests that spanking and sexual submission be divided into three categories – cultural, subcultural and interpersonal sexual scripts. These are the sociological blueprints that explain who, what, when, where, why, and how we engage in certain sexual behaviors. Cultural scripts refer to a country’s ideologies and expectations, while subcultural scripts reflect these ideologies on a local level and interpersonal sexual scripts describe the interactions you have with others.
3. It’s a form of discipline
Many kinksters claim that spanking is erotic and liberating. This likely comes from the release of feel-good hormones like oxytocin and adrenaline. It also depends on who is doing the spanking. Some prefer a firm, hard hand to their ass or a paddle, while others may want soft, open-hand slaps. Ask before you spank.
Pleasure-based kink educator Lateef Taylor explains that “just like all therapy, there’s a difference between slapping willy-nilly and spanking for pleasure.” She adds that, to make the most of it, one should focus on form: “Make sure you’re hitting their ass just right. A well-placed slap to the buttcheek can give you powerful and surprising pleasure.”
Spanking is a popular tool in Dom’s arsenal, but it’s important to know when it’s appropriate. Rebecca Plante, associate professor of Sociology at Ithaca College, explains that parents are more likely to spank a child when they are frustrated and tired. That’s why it’s important to get down on your child’s level, use eye contact and clearly state what they need to do.
4. It’s a form of control
The kinkier plays of bondage, tortures, and spanking are all things that BDSM people love, but even those who don’t identify as sadomasochists might be surprised to know that they’ll enjoy the gratifying sound of a firm slap on their boobs. It’s like Thor hurling thunderbolts down from above.
Research has found that a slap on the ass triggers dopamine release, which heats up the brain’s reward and pleasure centers. But there’s more to it than that.
Plante breaks down the reasons why people spank others into three categories and eight subcategories: Power (including giving someone else power and being physically restrained); Pain (including receiving physical pain for itself, causing pain for another person, and experiencing sensations of humiliation); and Cognition (including reaching an altered state of consciousness, feeling focussed and/or relaxed, and finding satisfaction in controlling others). And there’s no one answer to that question – it really depends on the individual. So if you want to try it out, be sure you ask your partner’s permission and give them a few light spanks first to see how they react.
5. It’s a form of entertainment
While it might seem kinky to get a hard slap on the bum cheek, there are lots of reasons to add spanking to your sex life. For one thing, it can be intensely satisfying for both partners. It can also give a feeling of being a super-aroused dominant sexual god, a sense control, and a strong connection with your partner. Plus, the sound and feel of slaps to your partner’s buttcheek can be a real turn-on.
Spanking is also a great form of entertainment because it can be so much fun. And it can also be very romantic. Keep your spanking within the “play area” (the area between the butt crease and the crack where the butt meets thigh). If you are new to spanking it is best to use a wood paddle (available in hardware and kitchen supply stores) to avoid accidentally splintering her ass. You should also be careful not to hit her too hard. Too much impact play can be painful, and if you’re both not into it, you’ll probably both want to stop.